When You’re the Last One to Get Married, Does Anyone Care?

Pat Falco Last Place Ever_web

Dear Wedding Confessionals:

I have been blessed to be surrounded by many smart, nice, generous, beautiful girlfriends. We have been through thick and thin together, and one by one they have all found their husbands. I tallied up that I have been in 9 weddings, 2 of which I was the MOH.  I’ve co-hosted and/or thrown all on my own just as many engagement parties, bridal showers and bachelorette parties and smiled through countless hours of bridezilla freak outs. All of which I was so happy to do and never thought to count all that up, until now. I’m the last one of the group to get engaged and no one seems to care. My question is, how do I get all my girlfriends excited for my wedding, now that theirs are over?

– Last one married in Minnesota

Bitch Session: What Should This Bride Do?

Jen: Have you ever experienced this before?

Paul: I haven’t, but I have friends who have and I am offended on behalf of brides everywhere.

Jen: Yes. This post makes me sad. She sounds like an awesome friend! She was in 9 weddings?!! She’s the Elle Woods of weddings!

Paul: She needs our help! How do we politely put her friends on blast?

Jen: Right! There’s something about this bride that makes this all about anyone but her!

Paul: I’m tempted to say “Give them my number. I HAVE WORDS.”

Jen: She should start with the Maid of Honor first, and then have that gal get the rest of them in formation! (Cue the Beyonce gif…)


Paul: I think that’s a fantastic strategy (and inspirational gif).

Jen: Even though they all deserve a good talking to, this girl seems too sweet to do it without it ruining her life. Pick one girl and have at it.

Paul: True. And if she’s close with the MOH (which I assume she is), she may be able to get it done without having to be too confrontational.

Jen: Absolutely. And….you know what’s probably around the corner for said bridesmaids? Baby showers. Pretty sure they are going to call on this very bride to help throw one. Girlfriend probably throws the best parties.

Paul: Holy sh*t, you’re right!  And if the light touch doesn’t work, I will recommend a “Come to Jesus (or whatever higher power you happen to believe in) Moment,” accompanied by a spreadsheet detailing expenses from the past. I know you know Excel, girl!

Jen: Yes! And write us back Last One!! Let us know how it went down.

Paul: Yes, please!  I want you to not have to worry about this anymore! Have a pleasant conversation with your MOH. And if that doesn’t work, gather your ladies in a room, start ranting and film it for Jen and me.

Jen: Yes! We will screen it every chance we get, and you will become a YouTube sensation, therefore making you the most popular girl in any room.

Paul: Yes!  And everyone will want to be part of the famous girl’s wedding!  Problem solved!


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