Do I Go On A Honeymoon I Hate?

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Advice:

Ladies and Gent! I’m getting married in July and overall I feel like I’ve been a pretty reasonable bride. I’m not stressed, yet, and feel as of now everything seems to be under control for the big day. Where I need some advice from you is after the wedding…the honeymoon. My husband and I are both young and chill and would like to spend a few days in Hawaii laying on the beach, but my parents have other ideas, as in insisting we take a cruise. We’ve politely tried to explain that’s not really us, and just short of us saying WE DON’T WANT IT, but they won’t hear any of it, because they think we’ll change our mind and love it once we’re there. Oh, did I mention they insist on paying for this cruise that we don’t want? I don’t want hurt feelings or fights before my wedding, but I also don’t want to be bullied into my own honeymoon. HELP please on how to navigate this delicate situation??!!

– Land Based Bride Continue reading

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Wedding Speech Dilemma: To Roast or to Toast?

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Advice:

My brother is getting married this summer.  Originally, I was told I would be giving a speech at the rehearsal dinner, which is going to be a pretty casual affair.  As the appointed “funny one” in the family, I’m taking this pretty seriously.  I planned a – in my humble opinion – hilarious presentation that includes one tiny jab at the bride and a slew of jokes at my brother’s expense, including the phrase “dry humping” and the f-bomb. Continue reading

We Can’t Shut Up About This Insane Harry Potter Themed Wedding

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From Brooke: 

Brides, The Berry, Buzzfeed and a slew of other websites are all freaking out about the wedding for Manchester couple, Cassie and Lewis Byrom.  These two went ALL OUT to create the ultimate Harry Potter themed nuptials.

The event included a wand for everyone as they entered, a HP themed wedding cake, and a sorting hat to place each guest at their table.  And the couple’s outfits were covered in Potter references, like a golden snitch charm bracelet, a bridal bouquet made from pages of Harry Potter books and Marauder’s Map inspired cuff links for the groom.

There’s no denying that this ceremony was elaborate and memorable, but we at Wedding Confessionals have a few points to discuss regarding this magical event. Continue reading

Hero Fiancé Destroys Family Heirloom

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Confessional:

After getting engaged, my future in-laws had us over for dinner.  After having a wonderful dinner and a few glasses of wine, my future mother-in-law shouted, “Oh! I almost forgot!” before running out of the room.  She returned with a large bag, which she proudly handed to me.  “Since I never had a daughter, it’s all yours!”  Then, while everyone watched, I pulled out a huge, long, tattered, old veil.

She then told me it was her grandmother’s, and that three generations have worn it, and she would be honored to have me carry on the tradition.

The fact that this thing was hideous and not even remotely my taste wasn’t even the worst part.  It was the smell.  This veil had clearly been worn to many weddings but never washed.  It was so gross.  I mean I was excited to get to know my fiance’s family better, but I didn’t need to share sweat marks with his ancestors. Barf.

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Tuxedoed Dog: Best or Worst Wedding Crasher?

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Confessional:

I just came from a wedding where the Mother of the Groom refused to come to the ceremony because they wouldn’t let her dog be in the wedding.  Actually, that’s not true.  The bride and groom agreed that it would be fine – and kinda cute – if the dog was the ring bearer or at least walked down the aisle with the ring bearer.  But that wasn’t enough for this Mother of the Groom.

She wanted the dog to be…wait for it…the Best Man in the wedding.  She said, “Since you don’t have any brothers, I think the only one who could be your Best Man is Patches.” Granted, the dog had been in the family for over a decade, but it was…ya know…a dog! Plus, the Groom had already asked his friend / roommate from college to be his Best Man, and didn’t think it was nice – or sane! – to tell him he’s being replaced by a dog.

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Martha Stewart was on “Say Yes to the Dress,” and we have to decide if it’s the best or weirdest thing ever!?!

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Martha v. Randy!  This is my Super Bowl.

From Brooke:
If you haven’t seen it yet, run – don’t walk – to your TV to watch TLC’s Say Yes to the Dress!  At first, you’ll be perplexed about how a show about women trying on white dresses in a store – Kleinfield in NYC, to be specific – can be compelling.  But stay with me – because it’s gotta be one of the most honest portrayal the bridal experience on TV.  Even if you can’t afford a $10K Pnina Tornai gown, you will relate to the passive aggressive Sister, overbearing Mother of the Groom or annoyed sale clerk.  It’s humanity at it’s finest…and by finest, I mean worst.  80% of the people involved are total jerks, and I love to hate them.  But the show is smart enough to squeeze in a few nicer segments, like of a bride finding a dress while talking about overcoming cancer and I’m bawling my eyes out for this stranger I’ve never met. Continue reading